Start: Wilton Woods Center
Theme: Harry Potter / A.S. Gispert Birthday Trail
Hares: Camo Sutra, Stump Happens, Straight in the Navy, Queen of the Jungle, Cum Brew Lay
It was a beautiful summernight's evening, not as hazy or humid as to be expected given that we live on top of a swamp. Once released by the RA, Justin Beaver, Hangover's very own Harry Potter doppleganger, following a rousing version of the Hashy Pokey, witches, wizards, and magical objects galore (even a Firebolt) all took off promptly at 7:37 p.m. to follow the three mystical trails that were laid out by the hares. I write mystical because some of the eagles apparently got lost in Diagon Alley and ended up at the On In by way of platform 9 3/4. There was butter beer and polyjuice potion for the more intrepid wizards among the pack, who following the trail circled up under the blue moon to hear all about the stupid things that were said/done on trail.
At sign in, Tony Panda said, "Wow, I have seven runs with Hangover!" To which Fister Roboto replied, "I wouldn't exactly call them runs..."
At the shot check, neither Fister Roboto nor French Toasted wanted to go into the water to retrieve the shot (whatsamatter, afraid you would melt? That's only wicked witches!)
The hares left a very pokey pygmy puff for Pebbles 4 P*ssy to pick up
Pebbles' hands got all numb from playing with her prickly bush
Yariben wanted to have a threesome with French Toasted and Just K*** (don't know why that didn't happen)
THANG made Little Spermaid walk funny because of chafing between her legs (so he's either doing it wrong or sooooooo right!)
Just M*****, with his blond hair and blue eyes, proved he just like all Swedes was a raceist bastard by breezing by the pack to the on in (maybe he was just thirsty?)
But perhaps most importantly, there was a very. solemn. occasion. A naming!
We learned about Just K*** that:
tequila makes her clothes fall off
she got cornholed
she wants to have sex with a horse
she flashed a cop and it worked
Based on this, there were a number of names proposed, such as:
Buck Sucker Chicken F*cker
Buck Cock-e (Bukkake?)
The wisdom of the pack prevailed, however, and henceforth and forevermore in the world of hashing (except Great Falls, f* them), Just K*** will be known as:
After trail, the pack retreated to ShadowLand Adventures in Springfield to cast spells on each other (that is, to play laser tag).
See you next month!
Yours in the Hash,
Queen of the Jungle